So you broke up. Whether you withdraw from the relationship or your boyfriend ends things for his part, you have either decided that you want your ex back. What’s next Do you just walk up to him and ask him to start dating someone again? Or should you have a step-by-step plan to get your heart back?
Knowing what to say to an ex-boyfriend is important, but knowing when to approach him it is equally critical. There will be times when your ex is emotionally immune to everything you have to say. Rather, there will be times when he will miss you and be extremely vulnerable to a well-placed phone call. From there, you can schedule a meeting with your ex, one of the most important steps on the road to getting back together. Understand that to get it back you will have to take many small steps rather than a few giant big steps.
One of the first things you should do after your boyfriend breaks up with you is lose sight of you for a while. When your ex doesn’t know where you are or what you are doing, destroy any comfort they may feel in seeing that you miss them. Instead of staying home feeling sorry for yourself and distraught over the breakup, you should go out with friends and family trying to distract your mind from those things. You shouldn’t be making phone calls, emailing your ex, or texting them. Similarly, you shouldn’t respond to any kind of contact your ex is trying to make with you.
When you’ve done this, your ex will miss you. You will start to think about the relationship in terms of whether or not you needed it in the first place. You will start to doubt your decision to end things, because apparently the breakup is not affecting you at all. These are all good things. They’re putting your ex into a mindset where he’s so curious about what you’re doing, that when you finally get back in touch with him, he’ll be dying to hear from you.
Getting your ex to meet you is the next step. Reconnecting with your ex should be easy, but you don’t want a long series of phone calls, emails, or text messages back and forth. To maintain that air of mystery, you need to be cryptic and brief with your answers. You must appear extremely busy, as if whatever you have been doing without him takes up all of your time. Then, when the time is right, you should offer to meet your ex for lunch or coffee.
A quick, no-compromise spot, like a coffee shop or casual restaurant, is a great neutral meeting place, and because you’re setting it up in the middle of the day, this type of meeting date won’t last long. Keeping things short is important here, because you always want to leave your boyfriend wanting more. Doing this will usually lead to another meeting.
When you meet him, you will want to divert the conversation from any heavy topic. Do not talk about the breakup, do not talk about the arguments or fights you have had. The conversation should be light and casual, as you both catch up on what the other has been up to. Try to get your ex to talk most of the time and not reveal everything about your new life. Leave a few things open for interpretation and make sure he’s still wondering about you when you leave.
From here, there are some great ways to move on to the next stage: dating your ex again. But for now, understand that you are not trying to get back with your ex boyfriend the first or even the second time you see him again. Take it easy and don’t act too needy, excited, or desperate to get back with him.
If you’re having trouble reconnecting with your ex boyfriend, don’t worry. There are several techniques that will help you call and want to meet with you. Learning these is vital, as they are a big part of getting your boyfriend back. Drawing out a step-by-step plan for exactly what you are going to do is the best way to ensure success.